Epicardial Ablation- Next week

I'm getting a little bit more nervous each day as my next heart surgery approaches. I wouldn't say that I'm worried, but maybe I am. I know the pain and discomfort I had from my surgery a little over 3 months ago was so intense that the memory still lingers in my mind and is terrifying me from wanting to go back under the knife.

While I hate the quality of life I have right now, I really wonder if I'm being too picky about what to expect and this surgery is in uncharted territory for people like me- with POTS. It most certainly will NOT cure my dysautonomia, but we have our hopes set that it will cure the tachycardia, the worst symptom of my POTS. However, there is a large possibility that by offsetting one symptom it will make some of the others compensate, thus be much worse. Those symptoms, like the low blood pressure, nausea, severe vertigo, and food digestion don't have as many variables to "play" with in terms of fixing.

One thing I have gotten through my masters program is the love for research and knowing how important the research is. However, if you search "epicardial ablation for pots", even Google offers nothing. The medical journals that I subscribed to describe in detail how to perform the ablations and almost what to expect, if I were a patient that they were typically performed on. I don't have the ventricular arrithymias that they write about, so I'm just assuming that I would fall into that class of subject patients. Of the thousands of people in my POTS forums, they always have information on the new medicines I try, tips, tricks, or strategies for bad days, regulating symptoms, etc. (advice on EVERYTHING). Searching for epicardial ablation, I got NOTHING! :( To be honest, this scares the S#*+ out of me! I have been praying fervently and exhausting my hours of insomnia researching medical journals, looking up medical terms (from the journals) and praying some more.

From what my doctor has explained to me (and he is said by MANY people to be the BEST cardiologist EP doctor), the operation will be about eight hours, I will have quite a bit of discomfort post-operation and will remain in the hospital at least 3 nights but probably more depending on how the pain and post-op go. I try to keep an positive attitude and think of the lighter side of things, like eight hours in surgery? Do they realize how much I like to eat!? :) Yes, I know that's trivial, well, kinda if you do know how much I love my snacks.

Here are some of the resources that I have read that help me a little bit to explain it to my family (mom):

http://stanfordhospital.org/cardiovascularhealth/arrhythmia/treatments/ablation/epicardial-ablation.html
"When considering all ablation procedures, supraventricular tachycardias are least likely to be treated epicardially and a modest number of ventricular tachycardias are treated epicardially. At most centers, epicardial ablation is not usually performed and selected centers, including Stanford, have the greatest experience with the technique."
        
2 side notes from me: I do have the superventricular tachycardia. Also, I was told this operation hasn't been done much at KU Med (3-4 times). However, my cardiologist did consult with the Mayo clinic, cleveland clinic, and other medical professionals before he decided that this was our last option.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/medicalprofs/epicardial-radiofrequency.html

This is one person's story of the experience: http://v-tach.blogspot.com/2008/07/stage-one-epicardial-ablation-grim.html (while his diagnosis is not the same as mine, there are many similarities)

http://www.theheart.org/article/884205.do

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3513239/ (this is from a medical journal so is more technical- which I like to read- but can be a little confusing)

Ultimately, my life is not my own and God already knows what the outcome will be. I rest in that assurance. I do sincerely try not to worry or be anxious about what is to happen, but I am just terrified of the outcomes or having my hopes set too high. I'm just worn out, exhausted, and fighting a spiritual battle each and every day against the negative emotions that would love to destroy me. I want to live a life that matters, that serves others and is a positive influence in my family life.

March 2013

March has seemed to fly by. We've had such a range of weather- from 80 degrees to blizzards in less than 48 hours! Malachi and Logan celebrated their birthdays at the beginning of the month and then Malachi officially turned 5 on March 11th.
Over spring break, we went to Salina to meet up with his birthday buddy, Journey. They don't know each other too well so I'm not sure how much they enjoyed getting together, but I know I enjoyed getting to see my friend and have some girl chat time. :)
 
 
  
Lucy, our new corn snake is doing great. She shed in the first week we got her and she is a great eater. Also, for a lot of spring break, the boys and I volunteered at the museum to teach kids about snakes as well as let them get to pet and hold our favorite king snake, "Cooper."





Here Malachi is feeding the snapping turtle a crayfish. Jeffery (the turtle) loves treats!

Malachi has started drawing and writing more. I'm so proud of him. I worried about this part of his academic development since he has really fought it for awhile, but he writes everything now! I love it! And during one of our "indoor days," Malachi made a snake exhibit. (Sorry, the pictures are from my phone.)
Malachi got some fun snakes and snake books for his birthday and he's been quite excited to read them. We've learned a lot about reptiles lately.

For our MOMS Club field trip, we went to the Daylight Donuts tour. It was very interesting to watch how they made donuts and the glazes. They sure have a neat process that they go through. Of course, Malachi couldn't concentrate because his best friend, Alisha was there and they were both a little distracted. :)
 


Logan was the Wilson Warrior on March 13th. He was proud to display his favoriate sports team items.


In the middle of spring break, we needed to make a trip "home" to my parents house to buy Shawn a new car. :( It was fun to see Courtney and her family though and also spend some time on the farm. Mom and Dad just had a new baby midget calf born that morning. Those are an anomily on a farm so it was quite the sight. It was so tiny but sooo cute.